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Much Ado About Nothing – What I Don’t Understand

Much Ado About Nothing March 8, 2018

 

Much Ado by Jean Ciampi

Did you know that 48.8% of Millennials felt climate change was the most critical issue facing our world today and that 78.1% said they’d be willing to change their lifestyle to protect the environment? I do my part and recycle and stuff, but I’m going to let younger, more energetic minds worry about the big issues, and I’ll worry about things like, why do cows all point the same direction when they stand together in a field? Maybe it’s part of climate change.

After you find the answer to that one, can someone please tell me why several days of sub-freezing weather only kills vegetation that has been paid for? If I paid good money for something in my flowerbed, it’s dead. Frozen, mushy, brown and dead. But the weeds come back energized and heartier than ever after their winter cryo-therapy. Why? If I bought weeds, would they die? Could I shred up some dollar bills for mulch for a better effect than wasting those same dollars on weed control and Round-Up®? Wouldn’t that be environmentally more responsible than applying all those chemicals anyway?!

Here’s another good question that maybe anyone can field: What’s an Instant Pot? Is it not cool to just have a Crock-Pot® anymore? Or is an Instant Pot just a Crock-Pot on crack? Maybe it should just be called a Crack-Pot. In so very many ways, I think that might fit.

I realize I could just ask Alexa or Siri or whoever the unseen-but-all-hearing entity is that lives inside the electronics that seem to have invaded my life. Except I don’t understand those either. To be honest, I’m still utterly fascinated at the magic of radio waves. My television screen had a message telling me to speak my request into my remote control. There was a time when doing things like that would get you a one-way trip to the booby hatch, so I’m not sure I’m completely comfortable with that quite yet.

Oh yeah, and can someone tell me why a good pair of scissors comes in a package that can only be opened with a good pair of scissors? Not to state the obvious, but if I had a good pair of scissors to open the package, I wouldn’t, well, need to open the package.

You see, Millennials, why I leave it to you to fix the big things.

You can also find “Much Ado About Nothing” online at www.thewriterjean.com.

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