Much Ado About Nothing – Offended Free Day
Good morning! Today why don’t we all do something totally new and NOT be offended by everything? You don’t have to make a lifetime commitment to this idea, but just for today let’s not be offended. To be honest, I’m really having trouble keeping up with all the political correctness; what I can and cannot say; and the constant fear I’m going to bruise someone’s delicate sensibilities. Not that I’ve ever bothered to tread lightly before.
So today, I’m going to freely make generalizations based on my personal experience because, gosh, that seems to be all I have. Unless you provide an informational handout that I can scan faster than I can look at you, I’m addressing you using the information presented. If you look like a girl to me, I’m calling you a woman. And yes, I’m sorry but “woman” does have “man” in it. Please. It’s just a word. How do you think opossums feel with that ridiculous “O” leading things off on their word? But you don’t see them demanding a federal injunction so they don’t get called OHpossums.
Today, if you realize my political opinions vary from yours, you are prohibited from shaming, threatening, bullying, or wishing a pox upon my family. You’re going to have to swallow that bitter pill that a whole lot of people might just think for themselves, even idiots. And their idiot ideas might be different from your idiot ideas. Fact: you being offended won’t make me less of an idiot.
Here are a few points to consider: I honestly don’t care what color you are, who you voted for, where you go to church, what team you support, who you work for, or the grade point average of your children in elementary school. What I do care about is if you use your turn signal, understand how the self-check lane works, and are self-aware enough to pull far enough forward that I can get to the speaker in the drive thru at Chick-fil-A.
Yes, I will judge you, but not because of which bathroom applies to you (even if it’s both). I’ll judge you based on your opinions about cilantro (it’s bad) and the remake of “True Grit” (also bad). I’ll judge your stance on single-use plastics, the designated hitter, and daylight savings time (all bad). But today, I won’t be offended.
