Happy Thursday. This came from a website called FriarMusings.com. Just an innocent conversation between God, and St. Francis of Assisi (patron saint of animals and the environment) along with Catherine of Siena. Enjoy. I certainly did.
GOD: Frank, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there on the planet? What happened to the dandelions, violets, milkweeds, and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought, and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honeybees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles.
ST. FRANCIS: It’s the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers weeds and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.
GOD: Grass? But it’s so boring. It’s not colorful. It doesn’t attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It’s sensitive to temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?
FRANCIS: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.
GOD: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.
FRANCIS: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it; sometimes twice a week.
GOD: They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?
FRANCIS: Not exactly, Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.
GOD: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?
FRANCIS: No, Sir, just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.
GOD: Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And, when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?
FRANCIS: Yes, Sir.
GOD: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.
FRANCIS: You aren’t going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it, so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.
GOD: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stroke of genius if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn, they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. It’s a natural cycle of life.
FRANCIS: You better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.
GOD: No!? What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter to keep the soil moist and loose?
FRANCIS: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.
GOD: And where do they get this mulch?
FRANCIS: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.
GOD: Enough! I don’t want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you’re in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?
CATHERINE: ‘Dumb and Dumber’, Lord. It’s a story about….
GOD: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis.
RECENT BIRTHDAYS: Actor David Selby is 82. Quentin Collins on Dark Shadows. Actor Barbara Hershey is 75. Singer Al Kooper of Blood, Sweat and Tears is 79. Singer Fabian is 80. One of the first pop rock artists ever to be known by just one name. Actor Mike Farrell is 84. Captain B.J. Hunnicutt on M*A*S*H. NBC news anchor Tom Brokaw is 83. Actor James Spader is 63. Boston Legal, Blacklist. Actor Kathy Najimy of Hocus Pocus is 66. Drummer Simon Phillips of Toto is 66. Vocalist Axl Rose of Guns N’ Roses is 61. Singer Rick Astley is 57. Never Gonna Give You Up. Composer conductor John Williams is 91. He’s had 52 Oscar nominations. Jaws, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, Star Wars, Schindler’s List, Jurassic Park, Indiana Jones, Far and Away, Memoirs of a Geisha, Superman… just to name a few.
Author John Grisham is 68. He has written 28 consecutive number-one fiction bestsellers and has sold 300 million copies worldwide and is one of only three authors to have sold two million copies on a first printing. Singer Carole King is 81. Singer Barbara Lewis is 80. Actor Joe Pesci is 80. (I watched My Cousin Vinny about a month ago… it was so good.) Author Alice Walker of The Color Purple is 79. Actor Mia Farrow is 78. Singer songwriter Joe Ely is 76. Actor Judith Light of Who’s the Boss is 74. Actor Ashton Kutcher is 45. Country singer Travis Tritt is 60. Actor Robert Wagner is 93. Singer Roberta Flack is 86.
Legendary American composer, songwriter, record producer, and pianist, considered one of the most influential figures of 20th-century popular music, Burt Bacharach, died at 94. In his lifetime, he had received three Academy Awards, six Grammy Awards, and an Emmy. He wrote, What’s New Pussycat? Raindrops Keep Fallin’ on My Head, The Look of Love, One Less Bell to Answer, This Guy’s in Love With You, Toledo (beautiful song with Elvis Costello), They Long to Be Close to You. Walk on By, There’s Always Something There to Remind Me, I say a Little Prayer for You, and so many more. Since I know the words to all of these beautiful songs, I now realize that my high school choir director must have been a big Burt Bacharach fan.
A synonym is a word you use when you can’t spell the word you first thought of. Burt Bacharach
John Arthur Spenkelink was executed in Florida in 1979. He spent his final days writing these last words on various pieces of mail: “Capital punishment means those without the capital get the punishment.” Convicted murderer Thomas J. Grasso used his last words to complain about his last meal. He said, “I did not get my Spaghetti-O’s, I got spaghetti. I want the press to know this.” Thomas B. Moran was a pickpocket, known by the nickname Butterfingers. He reportedly stole as many as 50,000 wallets in his career. He died in Miami in 1971, and his last words were, “I’ve never forgiven that smart-alecky reporter who named me Butterfingers. To Me, it’s not funny.”
Volunteering is the ultimate exercise in democracy. You vote in elections once a year, but when you volunteer, you vote every day about the kind of community you want to live in. Anonymous
The Flash (perhaps one of the greatest superhero movies ever made) is set to premiere on June 16, 2023, and Michael Keaton will return as Batman. I repeat that with excitement. Asteroid Sar2667 exploded over the English Channel as it entered the Earth’s atmosphere, just hours after it was spotted, a historic first. Queen Consort Camilla tested positive for Covid. In January 1957, the Wham-O company made their first batch of aerodynamic plastic discs, now known as the Frisbee. The GCBO will have bird banding February 18th from 8am to noon. There will be a plant nursery and picnic tables available for family picnics. www.gcbo.org. It’s a memory that your kids will have forever. Just saying.
It’s NOT just football. The Eagles and the Chiefs both agree that the Super Bowl turf that had been installed at a cost of $800,000 was the worst field many of them had ever played on. It was beautiful grass that had been babied by bringing it out (how?) into the sun every day for two weeks pre-game, but during the game it turned into a slick mess described as, like playing in a water park. Chris Stapleton brought the Super Bowl crowd to tears with his deeply soulful National Anthem. Then Rihanna (richest female musician in the world) belted out a medley of songs and had led everyone to believe she was bringing a special musical guest out during her hit-filled performance, but instead surprised the crowd by showing off her baby bump #2. Her horde of backup dancers were dressed in pillowy white outfits that looked like stacked mini-marshmallows or the Michelin Man, even described by some as UFO’s from China, recently shot down by the U.S. American Sign Language performer Justina Miles was the first deaf female to ‘sign’ Super Bowl Halftime and kind of stole the show. Her performance was crazy good. The 20-year-old performed alongside Sheryl Lee Ralph for Lift Every Voice and Sing, then alongside Rihanna for her entire performance. Troy Kotsur signed the National Anthem alongside Chris Stapleton, then Colin Denny performed America the Beautiful through a blend of ASL and North American Indian Sign Language to accompany R&B legend Babyface. Trump says, “halftime show was the single worst Halftime show in Super Bowl history”- “an epic fail” – such a lonely guy. If everything works like it should, they get a chance to do it all over again next year.
Clara Harris, former Friendswood, and LJ dentist who used her car to run over and kill her philandering husband, orthodontist David Harris in 2002, served 15 years in prison for manslaughter, then was paroled in 2018. She has now completed her parole requirements. Harris testified that she didn’t mean to kill her husband, she was simply trying to wreck the SUV belonging to the mistress, his former receptionist, Gail Bridges. I said it then, and I still say I can’t believe a jury of her peers found her guilty. Did I mention that the location of the killing (Nassau Bay Hilton) was also where Clara and David had married on Valentine’s Day in 1992.
God created war so that Americans would learn geography. Mark Twain
A German cryopreservation startup company called Tomorrow Biostasis has already preserved the bodies and/or brains of at least ten deceased bodies, hoping/attempting to learn to treat and reverse the person’s original cause of death and bring them back to life. There are hundreds of people on a waiting list, (the process is technically considered a scientific body donation), some wanting just their brains preserved (cooled to 196 degrees Celsius and placed inside an insulated tank with liquid nitrogen) and may prefer a new 3D printed body… if they can figure out how to make it all work. Just telling you what I read.
The U.S. issued a top-level 4 advisory (that’s the highest level) this week telling American citizens to leave Russia immediately. “U.S. citizens residing or travelling in Russia should depart immediately. Exercise increased caution due to the risk of wrongful detentions.” This comes as the Russia-Ukraine war nears its first anniversary on Feb. 24th, amid concerns that Moscow is gathering troops for an attack of some kind that could coincide with the one-year mark.
The 27-foot-long Oscar Mayer Wienermobile was in Las Vegas over the weekend for Super Bowl events. One morning crew members found that the engine wouldn’t start because during the night someone had stolen the catalytic converter from the hotdog on wheels. Talk about a prejudice-motivated crime! 😊 Have a great week and thank you for reading and shopping with us!
Lisa
Send comments to Lisa Baker at lisa@thesourceweekly.com
