Tattoos have never been my favorite thing, but so many friends have them, and I still love my friends, so tattoos must be ok. 😊 Perhaps I have just always been a bit jealous that I do not have the commitment it takes to put something on my body that will be there forever. No changing your mind. Well, I could change my mind, but it wouldn’t matter. It’s not like changing your earrings, or perming your hair then dying it pink. I worked as a medical assistant for a doctor that removed tattoos when I was in my 20’s, and I can tell you that I have seen some tattoos that you wouldn’t believe. Now, a company called Ephemeral Tattoo is offering a new type of tattoo, which promises to fade away in 9-15 months. Fade?  Sounds positively genius to me. So much less to regret. They are taking appointments and are already booked for three months. They use the same tattoo machine needles, it is just as painful, and it still causes trauma to your skin. The ingredients are FDA-approved but it will cost approximately three times more than a regular tattoo. I asked some friends. Nah. If it was cheaper, maybe. I believe we will be hearing plenty more about this.

Parenting books just do not prepare you for your college-aged children hoarding all of your dishes and silverware in their bedrooms.

An Uber driver in Boston has been charged with kidnapping after he allegedly locked, then trapped a female passenger in his car last week and refused to let her out even as she screamed for help. The driver climbed into the backseat and the passenger somehow managed to crawl into the driver’s seat, unlock the child safety locks, and exit the vehicle. His lawyer claimed the incident was miscommunication. I cannot even imagine getting into any kind of vehicle with a stranger without carrying, at the very least, pepper spray. Doesn’t matter if it is Uber, licensed cab, or a date.

I wanted to blame quarantine for my constant oily hair until I read the shampoo bottle this morning and it said conditioner.

In Anchorage, Costco shoppers are having their groceries stolen by ravens (large heavily built crows) waiting for them in the store parking lot. One customer looked away for just a moment and lost a whole slab of short ribs. One customer said his stolen piece of meat was huge, and way too heavy for a bird. One customer said they even tried to steal mini-watermelons and were very dedicated to their mission.

Just overheard the phrase, “pregnant with a baby,” secretly wondering what the other options were.

This story made me smile and cry at the same time. Maybe because my sweet rescue dog Teller, just loves his toys, especially if there is a squeaky inside. When he was on the streets, I always saw him with a water bottle or a piece of cardboard in his mouth. I believe those were his street toys. In the first few days after we adopted him, we took him to PetSmart, where he surveyed the toy isle, then picked up Cookie Monster and took him to the counter, ignoring all the rest. I looked at my daughter and said, “Well, I guess Cookie Monster is coming home with us.”  In North Carolina, animal control officers were called to a Dollar General because a lab mix kept darting into the store every time a customer left, grabbing the same stuffed purple unicorn toy. The officer who responded to the store’s call, was so taken with the dog’s devotion to the unicorn that she bought the $10 toy for him…before she put him in the truck. The shelter posted a picture of newly named “Sisu” and his unicorn saying, “This is what happens when you break into the Dollar General consistently to steal the purple unicorn that you laid claim to but then get animal control called to lock you up for your breaking & entering and larceny, but the officer purchases your item for you and brings it in with you.”  Sisu has a new adoptive family and was able to take his purple unicorn along to his new home. 😊Hmmm. A happy ending.

RECENT BIRTHDAYS: Country singer Reba McEntire is 66. Singer Lady Gaga is 35. Comedian Eric Idle is 78. Singer Bobby Kimball of Toto is 74. Actor Bud Cort is 73. Harold and Maude (I loved that movie). Model Elle Macpherson is 58. Game show host Peter Marshall is 95. The Hollywood Squares. Drummer Graeme Edge of The Moody Blues is 80. Rock musician Eric Clapton is 76. Actor Paul Reiser is 65. Rapper MC Hammer is 59. Singer Tracy Chapman is 57. Country singer Thomas Rhett is 30.Actor Richard Chamberlain is 87. Dr, Kildare. Actor Shirley Jones is 87. Shirley Partridge. Musician Herb Alpert is 86. Actor Christopher Walken is 78. Comedian Gabe Kaplanis 77. Welcome Back Kotter. Actor Rhea Perlman is 73. Cheers. Singer Russell Thompkins Jr. of The Stylistics is 70. Actor Matthew Broderick is 59. Singer Fergie of Black Eyed Peas is 46.

Guitarist Mick Ralphs of Bad Company and Mott The Hoople is 77. Guitarist Angus Young of AC/DC is 66. Actor Ewan McGregor is 50. Actor Ali MacGraw is 82. Love Story. Singer Rudolph Isley of the Isley Brothers is 82. Reggae singer Jimmy Cliff is 73. Singer Susan Boyle is 60. Actor Linda Hunt is 76. Singer Emmylou Harris is 74. Drummer Dave Robinson of The Cars is 72. Actor Marsha Mason is 79. Singer Wayne Newton is 79. Singer Tony Orlando is 77. Guitarist Mick Mars of Motley Crue is 65. Actor Alec Baldwin is 63. Actor David Hyde Pierce is 62. Frasier. Comedian-actor Eddie Murphy is 60. (He has 10 children.) Actor John Astin is 91. Gomez Addams in The Addams Family. Actor Warren Beatty is 84.

King Kong is 88 years old. His first appearance was during the Great Depression in 1933.Godzilla vs. Kong was released on HBO Max March 31, and in some movie theatres. The two have fought before, but it was 59 years ago, in 1962, where the giant gorilla escaped from captivity in Japan and tried to whip up on the recently thawed lizard.

Actress Jessica Walter died at 80. I will remember her best as Lucille Bluth in the hit, Arrested Development. It is a fast moving and very funny show if you are looking for something to watch. Also, she was totally great in Play Misty for Me, Clint Eastwood’s directorial debut and her first major film role. Walter played an obsessed fan/stalker of a popular disc jockey, that shows you how a one-night stand can turn your life around. I can’t hear the song now without looking over my shoulder. Great actress!

Librarian turned author Beverly Cleary, died at 104. She had a gift for recalling the inner emotions and anxieties of childhood. Children saw themselves, friends, pets, and families on the pages of her books. Generations of children (and in this case, a parent) feel like we have lost a beloved friend. Cleary published over 40 books about such characters as Henry Huggins, Ramona, Beezus Quimby, and Ralph S. Mouse. Cleary received the National Medal of Arts, the Newbery Medal for Dear Mr. Henshaw, the National Book Award for Ramona and Her Mother and the Catholic Library Association’s Regina Medal Award for her contribution to children’s literature. She also received the University of Southern Mississippi Silver Medallion, the Every Child Award, the Laura Ingalls Wilder Award, and was named a Living Legend by the Library of Congress. Oh, and she never owned a computer, just a typewriter.

We are never going back to wearing neckties, right? I mean newscasters, politicians & Diane Keaton can keep doing it if they want, but the necktie thing is stupid and looks ridiculous with sweatpants. Jim Gaffigan

A San Diego man was arrested after he bypassed several barriers and took his 2-year-old daughter well inside the African bull elephant enclosure. People yelled for him to get out because he was unaware that the elephant was coming up behind him. He ran, dropped his daughter on her face, picked her up and went through the fence just in time. He was being held on $100,000 bail. How utterly foolish.

The flaming red Hagstrom Viking II guitar that was used by Elvis Presley during his nationally televised 1968 Comeback Special is being auctioned. The guitar was also featured on the cover of the From Elvis in Memphis album in 1969. Starting bid $250,000. The auction company will also have a crystal-studded glove worn by Michael Jackson, a 1950 Cadillac Fleetwood featured in the movie The Godfather and previously owned by Mae West, along with Elizabeth Taylor’s blue rhinestone drop earrings.

A friend and her husband recently ventured north of Fort Worth and Denton, to Pilot Point, Texas, population 3,856. She posted pictures of the most beautiful tulip farm. If you are looking for a day trip to see something wonderful this spring, then I recommend it.  You can pick tulips for $2.50 each and make your own bouquet. Go to Texas-Tulips.com. The blooms are only on display from late February to early mid-April. They had to close early last year because of nasty rains. Free parking and $5.00 entrance fee. Hurry. Also, in Pilot Point, is Sharkorosa Wildlife Ranch with llamas, camels, zebras, kangaroos, and more. If you are looking for something to do a little closer to home, how about a beautiful drive to Chappell Hill Lavender Farm in Brenham. They have such fun events. Painting classes, tea workshops, yoga & mimosas, or just a stroll around the grounds with shopping. They sell homemade cookies made with lavender that are so unusual, and so delicious.

Disney says that Harrison Ford will return for a 5^th Indiana Jones movie, due to be released sometime in July 2022, 14 years after the last installment and the same month that Ford will turn 80.Filmmaker Ken Burns is at it again along with Lynn Novick, as they release their latest PBS Documentary series about the talented and troubled Nobel Prize winning author, Ernest Hemingway. On April 5-7, you will have the opportunity to watch Hemingway, featuring Jeff Daniels voicing the author, and Meryl Streep, Keri Russell, Mary-Louise Parker, and Patricia Clarkson as his wives.

Mikayla Holmgren was the first woman with Down Syndrome to compete in a Miss USA pageant in 2017 when she entered Minnesota’s competition. She is now 26 and is hoping to make history by becoming the first female model with Down syndrome to be featured in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. She has submitted her audition tape and is waiting to hear back.

The ship Ever Given, that was stuck in the Suez Canal, was helped by 14 tugboats that were working day and night to push and pull the vessel, but were finally assisted when the full “worm” moon brought a spring tide. The ship is now free again after a shutdown that cost Egypt tens of millions of dollars. Have you seen pictures? It is HUGE. 1,312 feet long (the Empire State Building is 1,454 feet tall) and 220,000 tons. Oil prices fell immediately after the ship was freed. Every day the canal was closed it was holding up as much as $15 billion in global trade per day. Even with the canal open, it could take a week to clear the backlog of more than 300 ships, many with tens of thousands of animals aboard that they are in danger of losing. At least 130 vessels are en route to the canal. 15 ships had given up and taken a route around Africa, which is a much longer route.

There was just a tad bit of digging in the dirt this weekend, so my brain is now consumed with gardening, which makes me so incredibly happy. I came across a cucamelon.  Most of us have not heard of this little fruit that is also called Mexican sour gherkin, mouse melon or sandiita, which means little watermelon. It is considered a delicacy in central America and Mexico, is about the size of a large grape, looks just like a tiny watermelon, and tastes like cucumbers and lime. It grows on a vine, needs a trellis, and is believed to be the next trendy super food. Hmmm. Cute and novel. You can pickle them for sour gherkins, or add dill and mint, even marinate in lime juice, soy sauce, rice vinegar, sweet rice wine and salt. Yes, I ordered a package of seeds. I will let you know. Thanks for supporting us and reading this paper. Don’t you need to sell something? Surely there is an object just taking up space. Have a great week and get that garden started.

Lisa