OUR LIVES AS THEY ARE RIGHT NOW: Stop…ok, go. No, wait. OK, maybe. No! No! No! Hmmm. Well. I just do not know. Ask me again tomorrow. Wait. It is, NO. Ok, yes. Isn’t it crazy? I am just so glad that I do not have young school age children at home and must decide whether to send them to school or not this year. There was a summer sleepover camp that opened their doors to campers in Georgia, took ‘all precautions’ (except staff only wore face masks and they didn’t open the windows for ventilation.) The kids supposedly did a lot of singing and shouting, which is what you do at camp. (Singing was thought to play a role in a superspreading event in which more than 50 people were infected at a choir practice in Washington state.) Out of 344 test results available, 260 campers and staff tested positive out of the approximately 620 staff and campers that attended. We are warned that children may not be spared sickness, nor the adults around them. The stakes are high, yet protesters in Spring field, Ill. are voicing their opposition to officials that says their children must wear face coverings when they return to school during the pandemic. This is a catastrophic challenge for working parents, students, and teachers. I know that I would not be sending my young children to school this year if I was required to decide. My daughter just gave up her UH dorm and parking space a couple of weeks ago and will be doing online classes this fall and living at home. She is sad. I am sad. But our job right now is to eliminate the spread and to stay safe.

Of all the things I learned in grade school, trying to avoid cooties was the last one I expected to use.

There is a new show, Muppets Now, on Disney+. It is an “unscripted” reality show-within-a-show with Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, and other favorites, along with plenty of real-life guest stars. Brad Pitt has been nominated for an Emmy for his impersonation of Dr. Anthony Fauci, on a Saturday Night Live skit in April. Pitt played Fauci as he tried to explain not to ingest disinfectant. There’s a new Showtime documentary called The Go’Go’s, that show their rise to fame in the 1980’s.

In a business, if two people think alike, one of them is not needed.

In cleaning out my purse a couple of weeks ago, I came across my Marble Slab punch card. You know, after 5 ice creams with the Slab Club card, you get a free ice cream cone at the Pearland location. Then, today I was told that we are going to have our very own Marble Slab Creamery at Brazos Mall. With all this crazy virus right now, it is so nice to happen upon a rainbow on occasion. Brazoria County Day is scheduled for February 23, 2021 in Austin Texas.

Taylor Swift released her eighth studio album and it is getting great reviews, all co-written in the past four months of quarantine. It’s called Folklore, and one of the songs, The Great American Dynasty, is the story of Rebekah West and Bill Harkness (heir to Standard Oil), the people that once owned the coastal Rhode Island mansion that Swift now owns. They called it Holiday House, and in its day, there were big names guests like Howard Hughes and Salvador Dali that dropped by to visit or party. Good story. Good song.

At least 135 people were killed and more than 5000 wounded, with some still missing in two massive explosions that shook the Lebanese capital, Beirut. The blast was so big that it was felt 150 miles away and was centered on the city’s port waterfront area next to grain silos containing 85% of the country’s grain. One report has blamed the catastrophe on tons of ammonium nitrate, which can be used to make fertilizers and mining explosives, while another report said it was a warehouse storing confiscated fireworks. Authorities claim the source of the blast had been the subject of warnings going back to 2014. Whatever it was, there is massive destruction that comes at a terrible time for Lebanon, on the brink of financial collapse.

RECENT BIRTHDAYS: Former MLB All-Star Alex Rodriguez is 45. Entrepreneur Mark Cuban is 61. Country singer Martina McBride is 52. She once sold t-shirts at Garth Brooks concerts. Rocker Geddy Lee is 65. Rush. Young adult author J.K. Rowling is 54. Harry Potter. Actor Robert Colbert is 89. He was Brent Maverick, the third Maverick brother along with James Garner, Jack Kelly, & Roger Moore.

Singer Tony Bennett is 94. He has two Emmy Awards in addition to his many Grammy Awards. Former President Barack Obama is 59. Actor Billy Bob Thornton is 65. Retired MLB All-Star pitcher Roger Clemens is 58. Actor Martin Sheen is 80. Actress Loni Anderson turns 74. Actress Maureen McCormick turns 63. Brady Bunch. Spice Girl Geri Halliwell Horner is 46. Comedian actor Jeremy Piven is 55.

John McNamara who managed the Boston Red Sox died at 88. Wilford Brimley, who worked his way up from movie stunt rider to mustached character actor with gruff charm, and menace, died at 85. His films included Cocoon, The Natural and The Firm, Brubaker, and The Electric Horseman. Hugh Downs, broadcaster extraordinaire, who hosted 20/20 for 21 years and Today for nine years, died at 99.

Work relationships are strange. I would give them a kidney, but they are not borrowing my pen.

A witness has come forward and claims to have seen Prince Andrew at a nightclub with one of Jeffrey Epstein’s teen victims. She remembers it because she accidentally stepped on the prince’s foot while dancing. She decided to speak out after watching Andrew’s denials, with him saying he had no recollection of that night, because he was at home after visiting the Pizza Express restaurant with daughter Beatrice. The witness said she had to come forward, because she was there, and does have a recollection of it. Poor Andrew. Oh, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive!

Grace Potter sent an email announcing all her concerts in the month of August…by way of drive-in movie theatres, mostly on the east coast. It is the new thing, but let’s face it, drive-ins have been social distancing since the 1960’s. In recent months, thanks to COVID, drive-ins have seen even more activity, repurposed as sites for weddings, high school graduations, dances, concerts and more. Everyone is supposed to stay inside their car or sit outside in lawn chairs 6ft apart. (The problem of course, is that people don’t always do what they are supposed to do, but what’s new…) The kids and I would go to the Showboat Drive-In in Hockley when they were little. Then we would spend the night at the Holiday Inn right down the road. We stopped for Mexican fast-food and had an absolute ball. Yes, it is hot sometimes, with an occasional mosquito, but it is a heck of an experience not only for kids, but for grown-ups alike. That is where I saw my first James Bond movie, Goldfinger, after my parents thought I was asleep in the back of the station wagon. Just remember to get there early because there is always a line and it is a long way to go, just to be turned away.  Yes, we were turned away once, so we went to the other side (of the double screen), parked the car the opposite direction and watched the movie we wanted to see with no sound. 😊. There is a new drive-in on Summer street in Houston that has their screen attached to the side of a large rice elevator, creating a wonderful experience, plus you get to pick up food from the Buffalo Bayou Brewery next door. I am in. Drive-Ins…a true American treasure.

Pay attention because the Texas sales tax-free holiday – the one weekend each year when most school supplies, clothes, footwear, and backpacks that cost less than $100 are tax free — is Aug. 7-9, this weekend. The tax-free weekend includes online purchases. Layaways, special orders, and rain checks are also included. If you pay sales tax on qualifying items during the sales tax holiday, you can ask the seller for a refund of the tax paid. The seller can either grant the refund or provide their customer with Form 00-985, Assignment to Right to Refund, which allows the purchaser to file the refund claim directly with the Comptroller’s office. On average, shoppers should save about $8 on every $100 spent.

Thank you, Connie M. who sent me an email just to say she was thinking about me. To Wes for the delicious recipe ‘because it looked like a Lisa Baker dish.” Then he brought me wine. If I ever send out Christmas cards, he will be on the list. Last week, I told you about my son having emergency surgery for his appendix. I forgot to say thank you to Sue, the nurse that wheeled him out of the hospital. Right now, we need more than ever, to say thank you to every medical worker out there. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You. To my neighbors for the tomatoes, okra, and cantaloupe. We added a chicken, rice, and spinach dish, and called it a feast!  Tina, for picking up toilet paper while she was at Sam’s (because they actually had some in stock.)  Kristin at Card My Yard for the very pretty 21^st birthday message for my daughter. It was great. Be sure to call Kristin for your next birthday, anniversary or whatever. It could also be for no reason at all…just to tell someone that you love them.

If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed. – Adolf Hitler

Last month, I opened a familiar envelope from Playbill, the in-theater program guide and magazine that has been arriving at our house for the past ten years or so. They were announcing that they would be taking a break during our pandemic especially since there is no Broadway to speak of in our near future. I honestly can’t imagine how we can ever replace being in a theatre…the excitement, thrill of dressing up and watching other people entertain us…but I can’t imagine setting aside my fears and common sense to walk into another theatre until a bunch of changes happen in our world.

If you hate wearing a mask, you are really not going to like the ventilator.

Plastic pollution is a huge problem for us. Some are cleaning up the bottles in the ocean and finding a use for the discarded bottles, but a Dutch company has found a plant-based alternative that degrades in one year. A single plastic water bottle could take 450 years to decompose, so that is a more than great improvement, but 90% of bottles are not recycled. Maybe we are one step closer to a solution.

Time Travel: 36 years ago, the “Where’s the Beef?” commercial had three grannies demanding more meat on their hamburger from an unnamed fast-food restaurant that was “Home of the Big Bun.”  The ad was originally titled Fluffy Bun and was an instant sensation, continuing with a series of sequel commercials, t-shirts, bumper stickers, Frisbees, board game and a recorded single. The ad boosted Wendy’s annual revenue by a huge 31 percent. More interesting is that Clara Peller worked as a manicurist for 35 years before being discovered in this commercial at age 80. She even had a cameo on SNL.  Now I feel like Clara Peller yelling, “Where’s the ads?” Sell something so I can quit yelling.

Ocean Conservancy has ranked balloons as one of the top three deadliest forms of litter, only behind discarded fishing nets and plastic bags. That is because when balloons burst, the fragments can look similar to jellyfish or other prey that animals like sea turtles eat. The ribbons can also become wrapped around animals as they swim in the water, which may hinder their ability to move or eat freely. The balloon industry markets them as being biodegradable, but they are not. It’s the only industry that encourages people to litter with their product, and once it happens, balloons last a very long time.

To test how long a discarded balloon can remain in an environment once it deflates, tie one to a tree where you live. Despite our Texas heat and intense storms, your balloon will still be intact ten years from now. Our garbage should not outlive us.

Every day, I say to myself, “Susan, you have to stop drinking wine.” Thankfully, my name is Lisa. Have a great week, stay safe, wear your mask, wash your hands, and find something to sell. We desperately need you to sell something or buy something from a small business.

😊 Lisa