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What I Heard This Week! November 8, 2018

What I Heard This Week November 8, 2018

Butterball’s famousTurkey Talk Line is now available on Amazon’s home assistant Alexa in addition to phone calls, texting or live streaming.It all began in 1981 when six home economists worked the phones during the holiday season and answered more than 11,000 turkey-cooking questions. Since then the Turkey Talk-Line has grown in both the number of calls answered and experts responding. They now have 50-plus experts including Spanish-speaking and ‘male’ talk-line experts that will answer more than 100,000 questions this year, so you are not alone. If you need to talk turkey call 1-800-BUTTERBALL (1-800-288-8372) or text 844-877-3456. The line is now open.

Consider this a public service announcement. Recently, I received mail that suggested this year’s holiday gatherings might be the perfect time to notice age-related changes in some of your family members. It listed the differences between the signs of Alzheimer’s or Dementia and just the typical forgetfulness of aging, so I have decided not to go anywhere for the holidays. I’m just warning YOU, they will be watching your every move.1. Be on your best behavior. 2. Rehearse the names of all the casseroles (write them on your hand) and 3. Don’t start telling a story if you can’t remember why you were telling it or what the ending is. When you see them eye-balling you, remember that you saw it here first. You could have stayed home, too.

Not to brag, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it. – unknown but understood by all…

Fall clean up and shredding day Saturday November 10,LJ City Hall 8-11. Shredding, used oil, eye glasses and cell phone recycling. On the same day at Brazoria County Fairgrounds is the Residential Electronics Recycling from 8-12noon. They will accept computers, mice/keyboards, laptops, toner and ink cartridges, routers, monitors, printers, cable boxes, servers, TV’s, fax machines, and phones.

Police in Georgia pulled over a man for driving with his 3-month-old daughter in his lap, only to discover that when he stopped, he had placed the baby on the floorboard at his feet and said, “I was just about to stop and change her diaper.” What he didn’t tell officers was that he had laid the baby on top of a stolen gun, there was marijuana in the driver’s side door and over 600 ecstasy pills shaped like Lego pieces. Lego pieces?!? You’re kidding me. The baby was not hurt, and the mother came to pick her up…sure wouldn’t want to be that baby daddy right now and catch the wrath.

Stafford Centre: Guess who’s coming? Gary Puckett & the Union Gap (Young Girl, WomanWoman) along with Gary Lewis & The Playboys (This Diamond Ring, Everybody Loves a Clown). What a blast from the past. November 9th. 281-335-4954. I just listened to Count Me In, and This Girl is a Woman Nowand it’s stuck in my head.  I was singing while pulling weeds in front of my office today.

Someone stole a giant inflatable colon from the back of a truck in Kansas City, Missouri. The stolen colon (it rhymes), which is 10-ft-by-10-ft and weighs around 150-pounds is used to raise awareness about colorectal cancer. Who would steal an inflatable colon? A $1000 reward was offered and a fundraiser to replace the colon raised more than $11,000. Police recovered the stolen colon but not before the puns started. Katie Couric tweeted, “Does anyone know the scope of the crime? Hopefully, there’s no obstruction of justice. We need to flush out what happened here and get to the BOTTOM of it.” Sigh. No arrests have been made and the organization does not plan to press charges.

Spend the evening of Saturday November 10th with Adriana Zabala, who was raised right here in our own community. She is now a world-renowned mezzo soprano and will be singing with the Brazosport Symphony Orchestra. bcfas.org/symphony or 979-265-7661.

RECENT BIRTHDAYS: Movie director Spike Jonze is 49. Married to Sofia Coppola. Reggae rapper Shaggy is 50. Movie director Ang Lee is 64. Best Director Academy Award for “Life of Pi.” Country singer Dwight Yoakam is 62. Community activist Martin Luther King III is 61. Movie director Same Raimi is 59. Spider-Man trilogy.Parodist “Weird Al” Yankovic is 59. Rock musician Robert Trujillo is 54. Metallica.Microsoft co-founder Bill Gates is 63.

Olympic track and field gold medalist Caitlyn Jenneris 69.aka Bruce Jenner.Actor Ryan Reynolds is 42. Actor John Lithgow is 73. Host Ty Pennington is 54. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.  Rock musician Bill Wyman is 82. Rolling Stones. Actor Kevin Kline is 71. Country musician drummerBilly Thomas is 65. He is the newest member of The Time Jumpers. R&B singer-rapper-actor Drake is 32. Actress Lee Grant is 93.Shampoo and In the Heat of the Night. Actor Dennis Franz is 74. Detective Andy Sipowicz in the ABC television series NYPD Blue.

Actress Lauren Holly is 55. Actress Julia Roberts is 51. Singer Ben Harper is 49. Country singer Brad Paisley is 46. Actor Joaquin Phoenix is 44. Singer rapper Frank Ocean is 31. Actress Angie Dickinson is 87. Singer Johnny Mathis is 83. Actress Fran Drescher is 61. Country singer Marty Stuart is 60. Actor Eric Stoltz is 57. He played opposite Cher in Mask, as a teen coping with a facial deformity. Actress Jenna Elfman is 47. Actor Ashley Hamilton is 44. Actress Annie Potts is 66.

TV hostJane Pauley is 68. Actor B.D. Wong is 58.The only actor in Broadway history to receive the Tony Award, Drama Desk Award, Outer Critics Circle Award, Clarence Derwent Award, and Theatre World Award for the same role, Song Liling in M. Butterfly.  Actor Ron Rifkin is 80. Actor Dermot Mulroney is 55. My Best Friend’s Wedding. Young Guns.Actress Julie Andrews is 83.

A 13-year-old won hands-down with her Halloweencostume, dressed as a ‘tired mom.’ The girl was holding a baby doll to a diaper burp rag on her shoulder, with another toddler baby doll wrapped around her leg while she held a Target sack as a diaper bag, a Starbucks cup in the other, a pacifier pinned to her bra strap, a shirt with spit-up down the front and a nursing pad slipping out the top, cheerios stuck in her messy hair and dark circles under her eyes. There is not a single mother out there that didn’t relate to this costume.  The girl happens to be one of nine children, so I guess as she has watched her mother, she has a fuller understanding of what its really like to be a mother. Oh, I almost forgot. There was also a bottle of wine in the diaper bag. I’m giggling just thinking about it.

Netflix will be making a documentary film about the entire life of Prince, with the support of the late musician’s estate and use of Prince’s archives. The new Elton John movie, “Rocketman,” due to release in May 2019, will have Taron Egerton playing Elton in all his rose-colored glory.

Harley-Davidson is recalling nearly 178,000 motorcycles because of a clutch problem. The recall covers 26 models from 2017 and 2018 and starts this month. Dealers will install the new part at no charge to owners.

A negative mind will never give you a positive life.

Thank you to Sue Cornell of Caldwell Banker for the really, cute little recipe calendar. She does the sweetest things for her real estate friends.Thank you, David for the kind words about AE. You are such a great role model.Congratulations, Peggy Wille as you retire from The Center for the Arts and ScienceBASF Planetarium board. You will be missed but know you will still be around when needed.Stars don’t retire, they just keep on twinkling.

Whitey Bulger was nicknamed Whitey because of his bright platinum hair and was known as an American organized crime boss, gangster and FBI informant. A sudden change in his medical classification suggested that his health had improved but he was actually a very frail 89-year-old in declining health when he was moved to a West Virginia prison.  A Bureau of Prisons official said the Florida prison where he was moved from, considered Bulger a nuisance with behavioral problems and wanted to transfer him. He was recently beaten to death in his jail cell apparently by fellow inmates swinging a lock in a sock. Mr. Bulger appears to have been the third inmate to die as a result of violence at the Hazelton prison this year.

You have to be really strong to read this one. In Iowa, there is a 29-year-old man on trial for leaving his 4-month-old son in the same heavily soiled diaper for “nine to 14 days.” The child was found dead at the parent’s apartment. The diaper had attracted maggots to ruptured skin and e.Coli followed. The coroner’s report showed the baby died of malnutrition, dehydration and infection. Well, I bet you can guess what I think should happen to this guy. The defense claims that he was an ‘experienced’ parent. Nope. I say no cushy jail cell for him. I would put him outside in a diaper and let nature take care of the rest.The baby’s mother will face a separate trial at a later date. Maybe they can find a place for them at Hazelton Prison now that Whitey’s cell is empty.

Mr. Rogers did not adequately prepare me for the ‘people in my neighborhood.’

Book of my week: Just finished listening to Decision Points, read by the author, George W. Bush. No matter your political preference, the stories about his family, 9-11, Osama bin laden, the war in Iraq and all that happened during his eight years was fascinating. I recommend it.

Mark your calendar: Santa is coming again this year to the LJ Downtown Gazebo. Thursday, December 13th from 5:30-8pm. Join us for a visit with Santa, goodies from the Parking Way merchants along with a trolley ride to see the downtownChristmas lights. Remember, it’s tradition and you have to create traditions for your children to remember when they have families of their own.

Tomorrow /temaro/n. a mythical land where I get all my stuff done.

Joke: A woman walks into a pharmacy and asked the pharmacist for some arsenic. He asks, “what for?” She says, “I want to kill my husband.” He says “sorry, I can’t do that.” She then reaches into her handbag and pulls out a photo of her husband ‘with’ the pharmacist’s wife and hands it to him. He says, “You didn’t tell me you had a prescription…”

A new spinal cord implant technology has one man able to walk more than a 1/2 mile, hands free. The implants use targeted electrical stimulation to specific parts of the leg, recreating the way the brain interacts with the body.The promising treatment shows the brain and spinal cord can re-establish a connection and people can regain some control over parts of the body they’ve lost. Experts say it’s far too expensive and impractical outside the laboratory setting, but for now it’s a great start.

About four weeks ago, I got up in the middle of the night for a drink of water and walked right smack-dab into a chair leg that planted itself directly between my left ‘little’ toe and the next toe. (Does that toe have a name? Ring finger toe?) Anyway, it’s been a month and it still hurts but there is nothing you can do for a little toe. Moral of this story. Slow down. Turn on lights. Have water at your bedside. Use motion lights. I bought 3 new ones at Costco on Sunday. Have a great weekend. Don’t forget to think about protecting your plants and thanks for taking the time to read this column. It is appreciated. Lisa

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